I’ve heard and made all sorts of arguments for the upsides of social media. Social media can be excellent. But other times, it’s the friendly equivalent of asking to be lit on fire.
When breakups happen, they hurt, especially if they ended abruptly after partners have become so attached to the comfort, joys, and even inconveniences of being with each other.
It’d have been ideal and just so great if the pain would go away just like that.
It would have been fantastic if the memories would just go as instantly and abruptly as them; and if every song on the radio wouldn’t seemingly remind you of the best moments you had with them.
It never happens that way though.
People spend days, months and longer struggling to find meaning for their new situation, to redirect their lives and generally turn away from that dead end.
Breakups make you seek best ways to bridge the divide between the blissful place you were and the new, unexpected misery you feel you’ve been driven into.
So what happens, most times, is that people try to still hold on to the past as much as they can.
The commonest way this is done in modern relationships is by staying on the social media platform of the ex.
This is basically like leaving a window open so as to peek into the festivities in a mansion you are no longer welcome in.
This actually does more harm than good.
Keeping up with the life and times of the person that broke your heart and dumped you is not going to help you move on.
First, seeing your ex being happy, or with another person after a breakup, while you are yet to move on will only make you feel extra miserable and bitter, two feelings you should actually be trying to downplay.
Out of sight is out of mind. What you can’t see can’t bug you and in this case, what you don’t know will surely not hamper your healing process.
While it is cool to want to remain friends with your ex after a breakup, such breakup needs to come after you have healed.
After you have come to grips with the fact that the relationship is over, after you have really moved on from him or her.
Before then, though, that partner needs to stay blocked. Contact needs to be cut off totally especially if you know the temptation to reach out is still strong.
Till you find your feet, happiness and become free of every negative vibe, you need keep that partner blocked.
The best unanswered question you can challenge yourself to live with is what it’ll be like to live without the “answers” that social media can provide. The best discomfort that you can throw yourself into is the space where you no longer have access to information that does nothing but harm. This is the unknown, and while it feels unsafe from afar, it’s quietly, secretly the real place of release.
So maybe it’s time to block your ex, out of kindness for yourself and without remorse.
Time to free up some space; tie up your own loose ends. Stop living with the questions you shouldn’t have to keep around. There are too many others that deserve your attention.
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